The Weekend Wash-Up – Round 3

After the longest round of all time came to a conclusion, the wash-up is finally here! It was another stinker from myself, I think the tone is almost set for the year. One year up 3 years down. Anyway, it’s time for the weekend wash-up!

LEGENDS

Zorko (102) – Zorko had to be in our considerations anyway, but now he’s playing half back?! Man oh man… I don’t know why it feels dirty, he has the pedigree and now the role. I give it the green light.

Sheezel (126) – Why I didn’t vice captain the guy who hasn’t gone under 120 I will never know. He just gets it done. Bloody legend.

Powell (103) – Tommy ‘the Power’ Powell! I sent out a well aimed rocket after his first half, where I was questioning what people had seen the week before. Well I got to see it for my own eyes in that second half, unbelievable. Gun!

Hewett (107) – The second squarest head in the comp was back to his best after his bye, congratulations to anyone that had the foresight to hold him! Still value.

Young (129) – Dossy! At half time I was thinking we had projected Young’s improvement ourselves with no basis, but that second half was unbelievable. That’s the dude we locked in our teams all pre-season. He has arrived.

Serong (118) – Caleb Serong looks truly unstoppable this year. Thank god he only scored 11 in the first, 118 felt unders! Unreal.

Ryan (112) – Ladies and gents, Luke Ryan is the real deal in Fantasy. Never did I think I would see the day where I was fully on board, but his role is similar to Tom Stewart’s, only slightly better! This wasn’t on my 2024 bingo card.

Martin (145) – Do you know what, a 44 disposal Nic Martin game was on the bingo card. The TOG%, the hunger for the footy, constant one two’s, kick ins… It’s everything we could ever ask for. He even misses enough targets to avoid the tags! L.E.G.E.N.D.

Bonner (127) – Leeeeegend!!!! Don’t you listen to the haters Riley, when you have 29 kicks no sh*t a couple might miss the target! Maybe the leather poisoning got to him in the second half. Just ride the wave.

Steele (124) – Jack Steele is back to his best, and his best is a bloody average of 120. What the hell am I doing? Awesome pick, but he’s doing it solo in that Saints midfield. Bloke needs some help.

McGrath (116) – I’m going to go out there and say it. Andy has arrived. I’m seeing a hunger and thirst for the ball I previously did NOT see. Great draft pick and a great POD, shame it’s a year too late.

Gawn (146) – Congratulations if you listened to Calvin, sadly I’m a sack of sh*t and did not. Max is back in a big way and could even be the number 1 ruck. Unreal.

Yeo (108) – I am fighting against Yeoy this year, and while he has gotten off to a flyer I’m only one pinged hamstring away from victory. 66% TOG is almost alarmingly low, but the score is incredibly high considering. He looks dominant.

Taranto (130) – Could you…? This bloke was a walk up 120 and legitimate captaincy option less than 12 months ago, now he’s priced under $900k and pumping out scores like this. Keep an eye on him.

Heeney (127) – Yeah he goes alright in the midfield. I still have Swans fans convinced he will go back to the forward line, and I need a hit off their crack pipe. Taylor Adams is only moving the needle one way, and it’s not the right way. Legend!

Grundy (103) – I was less than convinced by his first 3 quarters, so it was nice to see Grundy actually try in the last. No marks to three quarter time, I think he may go for me next week. Still, a ton is a ton.

Worpel (152) – What the hell. That was no ordinary storm that circled the MCG on Monday arvo…. Spooky stuff.

Stewart (110) – I was out of my seat cheering for Beef Stew to sit the last quarter, which really sums me up as a fantasy coach and perhaps more importantly a person. Terrible stuff, good to see he finished out the game strong. Gun.

Dempsey (102) – Sometimes in this game, you need to accept your mistakes. Then you need to fix them. Ollie Dempsey is a genuine gun. 88% TOG , 22 disposals, 6 marks, 7 tackles… No goals required, just gut running up and down a wing. He’s in for me this week considering the state of the forward line.

LOSERS

De Goey (52) – This is what never again lists are for. Use them wisely…

Macrae (31) – It’s a shocking time to be a Macrae right about now. I think that may be the last we see of old mate Finlay outside of the VFL….. It’s not for everybody.

LDU (77) – This is no good. There is no way anybody who owns LDU this year had him in 2023, it only takes one ride of this rollercoaster to know what’s good for you. Ugly stuff.

Fisher (76) – In any other line or any other year Zac Fisher is culled this week. The ceiling that comes with his role saves himself in my forward line for as long as he’s getting picked. I’ve gone soft.

Williams (60) – This is f**king grim honestly. I get that his price is ticking over but good lord man, DO SOMETHING. I genuinely forgot he was playing until the second quarter last Friday. In the bin come Round 6.

Pink (20) – The stink…. Honestly you have to feel for poor Toby, he has lost 3 times as many contested 1v1’s than any player this year. He’s already halfway to last seasons leader through 3 rounds! There’s a good chance he left the ground in tears after that performance. I think his pulse is fading…

Fyfe (61) – He was better off getting subbed! This was the fear in games where he doesn’t mark or tackle, I’ll admit I was off the mark on Fyfey. Still, you could do worse in the forward line, which says it all.

NWM (71) – Step aside Nasiah, Bonner has come to take your crown. I think Essendon made it pretty clear they didn’t want the ball in this jets hands, but when you can only manage 71 points in a fantasy feast like this…… Not even close to good enough. Considering the DPP flood that is on the way, he is looking like a list clogger.

Windhager (60) – The Windy experience went exactly as you would expect. If you had any level of common sense that is. The wind was about as useful as an ashtray on a motorbike, and he did you a favour by getting himself suspended. Just remember, the role is only half the problem… They need to have ability as well. Embarrassing performance.

Wilson (35) – The VFL is knocking for the youngest player in the comp, he looks a little over his head right now. I am concerned.

Butters (79) – He’s a ***t. I’m a ***t. ***k this game. That’s all I need to say here really. Picking a bad captain this week was mission impossible, but call me Tom Cruise because when it comes to captain debacles I am Ethan Hunt.

Salem (52) – Considering the game was tight, Salem didn’t have his opportunity to play kick to kick for 10 minutes. So really he did exactly what he did last week, only you didn’t get saved this time. Time to go.

Windsor (38) – I get that Port are red on the scale but jesus this was a tough fantasy game. The forward line is a sad state of affairs.

Howes (23) – Oh it gets worse this game?! Was he playing lockdown? Did he suffer a stroke? Either seems just as likely. Disgrace.

Billings (30) – Speaking of disgraces, has there even been a better picture painted of Jack Billings over this first month? A 10, a 140, and a 30. You can’t script that sort of stuff. This is what you get for trading in Jack Billings though.

Reid (43) – I no longer have the need. In fact I do. I have the need to get Reid as far away from my field as possible. I know I’m not allowed to criticise him, he’s young etc. etc. The bloke looks like I would after a few repeat efforts early in the season… Unfit as hell.

Gulden (83) – Keep getting these sh*tshows out of the way Errol, he’s still a prime target for me in Round 6. Surely there’s a 160 pending against the Eagles this week…..

Jordon (60) – I get that James Jordon is supposed to play the Eagles this week, but I have a more important question. Who does their VFL team play? G.A.W.N.

D’Ambrosio (60) – Conditions weren’t ideal, but the role wasn’t either. What’s he doing on a wing?! He’s a quick cash grab then goneski in Round 6.

THIS GAME SH*TS ME

The margins in this game are so small. A bad rookie roulette roll. A 50/50 starting pick. A captaincy here and there. A solid team has found itself 500 points behind in 20,000 and I’m sitting here feeling like an idiot. Zak Butters. ****. This game sh*ts me.

THE OTHER BITS AND PIECES

1909. 20008. It’s solid but it was a real moving week for the serious teams, and I am not a serious team. Clearly. It has to happen next week or it won’t happen at all, and let me tell you. Best 18 has been saving my ass. Another 3×30’s or worse dropped off for me this week, I have a sick feeling Round 4 will be the nail in the coffin.

James Jordon will likely need to go next week, but watching Ollie Dempsey dominate on Monday I think he’s gone for me this week. My second move will be an important restructure to get Matt Roberts on my field and my bad forward rookie off. That means my boy Holmesy has to go sadly, and Flanders comes in. But f**k me I want Tom Green. Expect that to change.

Jordon -> Dempsey

Holmes -> Flanders

Best of luck next week legends, be sure to check out the podcast for our full recap of the round! See you next week, let’s make it a high scoring one!

Matt