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Weekend Wash-Up

The Weekend Wash-Up – Round 11

You should see the size of Matt’s score this week!

Hold your breath. Grundy got the snowball rolling, and I’m still feeling anxious. It’s hard to know what direction this week is going until Thursday teams, but we can still reminisce on last weekend’s scoring. Well, some can. It’s time for the weekend wash-up!


Macrae (147) – Where else can this segment start? We always knew Macrae was a genuine ball magnet, but this wannabe pig is getting down and dirty in the mud. That’s consecutive weeks with 9 tackles, and when you start combining 40 touches with a heap of hugs it’s always going to be massive. Bloody legend.

Bontempelli (120) – The Bont never gets recognised as a fantasy stud, but he is on fire. That’s seven weeks of total dominance. Charlie?

Gawn (118) – Max doesn’t need to be a sole ruck to dominate, he’s nearly averaging more disposals than hit outs lately! It hurts watching Melbourne and not owning Gawn, that changes this week. Safe as houses.

Mayne (123) – Chopper, noodles. Never did I think I would be writing about the legend Chris Mayne without a hint of sarcasm. DPP makes him relevant, and he’s just racking up +6’s. A roughy in more ways than one.

Higgins (115) – What the hell happened last weekend? Shaun Higgins now? There’s going to be some bridges burnt over the next few weeks, but Higgins has looked awesome. But it’s Shaun Higgins. But he’s been great! But Duncan is back after the bye. But he has forward status! Consider.

Crisp (110) – Consider him as a midfielder in the mould of Rory Laird now. An awesome pick and has an awesome bye. Great trade target.

Zorko (125) – Dayne Zorko has been unreal since Neale went down, averaging 107. Huge numbers, but I’m not convinced they can stay this high. He’s awesome regardless.

Taranto (143) – I may as well include the entire GWS list here. In a 10 goal spanking, they STILL managed to rack up huge numbers! Whitfield (122), Ward (119), Hopper (114), Cumming (113), Ash (111) and Kelly (108) were all absolutely epic, in fantasy terms of course. For most teams those numbers would only go alongside a 10 goal win. Quite frankly Tim Taranto butchered it on the weekend, as if we care. I couldn’t care less. He’s averaging 125 in this last 5. Not only is he a top 8 midfielder, he’s probably a top 5 player in fantasy. Legends the lot of them.

Dunstan (140) – Who’s this guy?

Hall (124) – Aaron Hall’s 5 round average is 125. He was priced at $538k at the start of said run. Easiest. Pick. Ever. This dude is a magnet, it’s awesome to watch. Must have.

Miller (160) – What if I told you Touk Miller, Darcy Parish and Aaron Hall were the highest averaging players over the last 5 rounds? 2021 is bizarre.

Lukosius (125) –  No questioning he’s a future star, I just don’t think I’m ready to say this is real yet.

Ellis (130) – He could be an option after his bye, I just don’t know which Brandon Ellis is real. If anyone out there chased him after his 169, would you recommend we jump on?

Parish (122) – My man crush is bordering on getting weird at this rate. Parish looks like a top 10 player, and not just in fantasy. He is a legit star. To make things even better I get to see him again on Saturday night. He’s getting the armband so feel free to jump on board and ride with me. Worth every penny.

Merrett (132) – This is more like it, I’m still waiting on a 140 but that’s just me being greedy. If there’s going to be a tag, it’s probably going to my boy Parish. Merrett should be ready to fire for the rest of the season.

Langford (123) – A legend brought Langford’s role change to my attention last week, and I got to see it in the flesh on Saturday. Wow. I’m a huge fan, and if he had a round 14 bye I’d be all over it. My issue is that he is the same price, same position and same bye round as Lachie Hunter. And I think I prefer Lachie Hunter. Last week was the time to jump on.

Keays (129) – If I was lucky enough to own him, I’d be as up and about for Ben Keays as I am for Darcy Parish. This guy ticks every fantasy box in existence. Kudos to the genius’ that own him in fantasy, and let’s face it those lucky bastards lucky enough to have him fall into their lap with a late draft flier.

Heeney (135) – OK, I think that ankle might be fine. It should go without saying that he’s still great value this week and arguably the best round 14 option when considering both price and value. He will find a way to average 90 again this season mark those words.

Cripps (120) – I’m happy to put my hand up when I swing and miss, and I missed on Patrick Cripps. Sure I don’t think he will kick 3 goals every week, just like I don’t think he will average 9 tackles per game like he has over his last 3. That doesn’t mean he isn’t great value. Should average around 100 making him a very viable pickup, but his round 13 bye is annoying.


Garcia (5) – I wouldn’t actually have blamed someone for going early on rookies last week, many did it with Bianco. If you did, this is a low blow.

Langdon (49) – Draft killer. This was out of the blue and he may be a cheap option coming off his bye… Forget I said that. Moving on swiftly.

Petracca (85) – A lot of coaches brought him in for Friday night’s blockbuster. Not even close to good enough. I had him pinned as a big game player, I’ll scratch that note out immediately. I’ll be taking unders on him next week to make a statement.

Macrae (12) – Were you hoping Finlay Macrae might play himself into next week’s team? Forget about Taylor Adams injury, there is a bigger issue at hand. That is, Finlay Macrae isn’t AFL standard. Not even CLOSE. How do you come onto the field for over a quarter with fresh legs and the game on the line, and have two touches. TWO?! Red dot.

Daicos (51) – Aaaaand it’s gone. It’s gone, it’s all gone. You had an under priced premium, not anymore you don’t. It didn’t do too well and it’s gone.

Guthrie (35) – How is Zach Guthrie carving himself out an AFL career? Never give up on your dreams kids.

Grundy (69) – You just knew that was going to happen. That’s disgusting. Thankfully things didn’t spiral from this point of the weekend, but it’s devastating to see the ruck pig go down. Must trade for me.

Green (51) – Good call bad call Caro? No DPP, and no scoring ability seemingly. Tom Green was diabolical. Disgraceful. However I also brought in Callan Ward for a 50, so I’m going to give him a chance. Sometimes you just have to back your gut in this game, and I thought Green looked like he had arrived against the Eagles. To be fair, those were witches hats. I’ve not given up yet, but this is shameful.

Ross (54) – Seb Ross still an option? Anyone?

Jiath (68) – Bye Felicia.

Farrar (24)

Mitchell (76) – I do my best to avoid watching Hawthorn at all costs, so I can’t really explain to you why the pig is getting so down in the mud. It’s 120 or 80 for Titch at the moment, and that’s not what you’re paying for. Is he a target after his bye? The Hawks are that bad it scares me off. Putting the brown in the brown and gold.

Phillips (76) – The most average player in the AFL. Not good. Not bad. Not exciting. No ability.

Ridley (54) – “In chaos theory, the butterfly effect is the sensitive dependence on initial conditions in which a small change in one state of a deterministic nonlinear system can result in large differences in a later state.” One head knock can derail a fantasy season. Not fair. Also not an option until he has a clear role change, you can’t go peeling off to far when looking after Liam Ryan. No good.

Williams (60) – I won’t be considering Zac Williams value until his price tag reflects this score. It’s a game of risk vs reward, and the reward here just doesn’t cut it when stacked up against the riskiest option since the mass investment into a meme coin. Again, 2021. Bizarre.

Walters (63) – I am not the guy you want to be asking when you’re looking for a reason to trade in Michael Walters. In fact now that I think about it, I’m exactly the right guy. To save your season. I took the fall so you guys don’t have do.

Sholl (46) – Ok. I bet you’ve all been patiently waiting for my favourite midprice picks to rear their ugly heads. As you can probably tell by the tone of the losers so far my weekend had been going pretty smoothly until Sunday. But how can I ever get excited about my score when I still have Lachy Sholl to play?

You play on a wing mate. Literally the only reason you are in the team is because you’re a great kick. Apparently. You need to actually kick the ball for that to be effective. I don’t know how a bloke can be so utterly useless with a role as good as this, it boggles the mind how he manages to be this bad. This took his 5 round average to 64.8. I’ve been kidding myself this whole time, there’s been an extra rookie on my field all along. COWARD. The worst part is I don’t have any choice but to hold him until his bye, after which he will probably be worth a bag of peanuts. Collingwood at home this week, if he can’t show something in that game there is going to be a massive blow up in the locker room afterwards. Just get me to round 14 honestly.

Serong (46) – Because the first thing I will be doing as lockout lifts is trading Caleb Serong’s sorry ass out of my team. He’s as useless as a celibate hooker. Can someone who watched footy in 2020 fill me in on how he was ever considered to be good? I didn’t see it myself and to say I’m struggling to believe it is an understatement. Here’s a statement on how pathetic Serong was on Sunday evening. He started the game playing a lock down role on Boak. I had heard a lot about this. “He played a tagging role last season, that was where he had success.” Great news I thought. His TOG% should be back up as well. Don’t worry about it. Justin Longmuir had to abandon ship at half time and send him forward. Wrap your head around that. A player was SO bad that the team had to drop the tag not because the opposition player was getting off the hook. But because the player on him offered next to nothing on the football field.

46 points? He had 16 at half time playing purely midfield. His 5 round average is 67. How? You only play on ball? Seriously, every second of the 60 minutes he actually plays is spent in the midfield. I don’t want this bloke near my fantasy team ever again, and yet Brodie Grundy’s pinched a nerve in his pussy and Serong must stay another two weeks. Lord have mercy on my soul (I’m going to hell anyway). His BE is 113 next week and I don’t think he gets within 80 of that. In fact, he may get dropped and honestly that would be doing me a favour at this point, even if it meant eating a donut. One of the worst to ever do it. Wow that felt good.

This Game Sh*ts Me

Byes. How about this. Why doesn’t the whole league just take a week off during the season? I know an All-Star weekend isn’t realistic, and I know we need to always have footy on. Please do tell me though, why we are happy to take a week’s break just before the finals?!?! Instead we have three weeks of craving more footy, and more importantly 3 weeks of stress and anxiety for us 100,000+ fantasy coaches. This league sh*ts me, and for the stress it causes this game sh*ts me too.

The Other Bits and Pieces

2217. I was on track for a genuine monster, that was of course until the two biggest bots in the AFL played on Sunday afternoon. Green, Sholl and Serong had absolute stinkers and it seems I took their boring 70’s for granted. 46. Forty-six. Wow. In a perfect world Serong and Sholl would both be seeing the door this week, unfortunately they have the round 14 bye and simply have to stay. Ironically it was Markov and Cumming who stood up and showed some ticker, and they both put their feet up this week.

My trades were going to be straight forward. Brockman and Macrae were going to Bianco and a basement rookie, I would have taken literally anybody named. I probably still will. That was going to net me the $$$ to go Serong to Gawn. Not on the fantasy gods watch. Grundy is out and he goes to Gawn, and this is the exact reason I HATE having cash in the bank. Sh*t happens and you never get to actually use it. Barring a miracle equivalent to jesus rising from the dead and Finlay Macrae getting named, he will go along side Brockman and I’ll have a nice kitty to attack with next week. It’s the one week I’m happy to do it.

Brockman -> Bianco

Macrae -> ?

Grundy -> Gawn

All the best in round 12 ladies and gents, don’t think we’ve escaped danger yet. Thursday is going to have some twists and turns and I don’t think it will turn in the right direction. You don’t want more than 20 this week, I’m even happy to just take 18 green dots! All the more scoring to come and you’ll sleep better for it. Here we go…



  1. Jag67

    June 1, 2021 at 8:08 am

    Hurry up, Thursday night teams…..

  2. Aby Benny

    June 1, 2021 at 9:27 am

    thoughts on downgrading kozzie to madden?

  3. Aby Benny

    June 1, 2021 at 9:27 am

    are you guys holding grundy?

    • BzG

      June 1, 2021 at 10:58 am

      Without decent alternatives, and already owning Gawn, I believe I have to hold Grundy. If I don’t, I’ll have to find a way to get him back rnd15 or 16.

      • Jmak

        June 1, 2021 at 11:43 am

        Darcy is a legitimate option, will go up in cash in the longer term and you can take the cash grab now, also has DDP

        • Scott

          June 1, 2021 at 12:32 pm

          I agree with trading in Darcy this week. I probably won’t bring Grundy back as think Darcy can be very similar in scoring over the next 8 weeks and the extra cash can help upgrade 2 rookies to premiums during byes.

  4. Aby Benny

    June 1, 2021 at 9:27 am

    Jiath to Whitfield or crisp next round?

  5. TJ

    June 1, 2021 at 9:51 am

    Your Welcome for Langford ;)

    • Matt

      June 1, 2021 at 12:40 pm


  6. James

    June 1, 2021 at 10:17 am

    Hold or trade ridley not sure about him

    • Aby Benny

      June 1, 2021 at 12:00 pm

      trade, role is gone

  7. Amy

    June 1, 2021 at 10:21 am

    Can go Warner to any premo midfield – should I go Macrae (with no cash leftover), or Parish, Bontempelli or Oliver?

    • Blood Brothers

      June 1, 2021 at 10:45 am

      Matt, you are a legend!

      And this game sh*ts me every week when I realise you’ve had a higher score than me.

      What’s your rank?

      • Matt

        June 1, 2021 at 12:39 pm

        Haha every dog has their day! Just moved inside the top 1000, being ranked 14,000 after Round 5 left a lot of work to do…

    • Aby Benny

      June 1, 2021 at 12:00 pm

      gotta have macrae, and no cash leftover so its meant to be lol.

    • Jmak

      June 1, 2021 at 2:19 pm

      ready made captain lock and load

  8. Luke

    June 1, 2021 at 12:41 pm

    Who to get in for Grundy? Keays, Steele, Walsh, Crisps, mills?

    • Aby Benny

      June 1, 2021 at 2:00 pm

      Walsh out of those guys, and whitfields probs the best defence option, but he has the bye this week.

  9. Bunda

    June 1, 2021 at 1:07 pm

    My trades:
    Lachie Young -> Bianco
    Grundy -> Gawn
    Serong -> ???

    Got 800k, who should I trade Serong for, can be any position

    • Aby Benny

      June 1, 2021 at 2:02 pm

      I’d go Whitfield. Depends where your rookies are. Whitfield for defence, Walsh/merrett in the midfield.

  10. Josh

    June 1, 2021 at 1:30 pm

    Is Heeney or Martin the better option?

    • Aby Benny

      June 1, 2021 at 2:00 pm


    • Billy Joe Bob

      June 1, 2021 at 4:51 pm


    • The Mash

      June 1, 2021 at 7:04 pm


  11. Jezza

    June 1, 2021 at 2:07 pm

    Matt great write up as usual and very solid score, need some help, I had 7 rooks on field last round but decent rooks in Poulter, Dev Robertson, Warner, RCD, Byrnes, L jones and Jordon. Unfortunately have Pendles who dropped 200k, would you be prioritising on upgrading those rooks mentioned or with the 3 trades move on Pendles ASAP?

    • Matt

      June 2, 2021 at 12:53 am

      Yes, move the rooks. Pendles hurts but all it takes is a slight role change and he’s back. Not going to climb the rankings with 7 rooks on your field

  12. Damo

    June 1, 2021 at 2:45 pm

    1) Hunter & Heeney OR
    2) Harmes & Cerra OR
    3) Harmes & Heeney

  13. Bec

    June 1, 2021 at 6:42 pm

    Hearing that Grundy might b back sooner than they originally said, can any 1 confirm.

    I’m probably going to trade Grundy next week for Reeves and then get him back in agian after his first game back, ride the BE game think his BE is 144.

    from the girl who loves her feet slimed

    • Johnny

      June 1, 2021 at 7:03 pm

      Waste of trades to trade him out then get him back in a week or two later, you must have such slimy and mouldy feet bec

      • Bec

        June 1, 2021 at 7:46 pm

        yeah ok johnny I hear u, it’s not a done deal, it was a thought of getting some cash, I have Gawn and was going to run with Flynn if he plays and have Reeves as R3 and maybe put Grundy on Utility.

        Yes trades are worth there wait in Gold thx will be reconsidering

        • Johnny bravo

          June 1, 2021 at 7:51 pm

          It could be worth downgrading Grundy to Darcy or O’Brien maybe for the cash and then get Grundy back later on
          Depends on ur team I guess

  14. The Mash

    June 1, 2021 at 7:01 pm

    Matt great read as always. So i am flying on Friday night. I have the senior Macrae with the V loop hole and the rest of this story is: I had Garcia. i gave the younger Macrae the C because he was not supposed to play Oh and I had Grundy. Why lord must you mock me

    • Matt

      June 2, 2021 at 12:52 am

      Oh no…… I was playing when Adelaide locked out but checked back in at half time to make sure O’Connor wasn’t sub, we do what we must. that’s a killer

  15. Bill

    June 1, 2021 at 7:53 pm

    Hey, Matt- with a score like that me doth think you complain too much.

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