DT Squawk – Trade Week

 

Hill Helps Replenish Eagle List

The Eagles have completed what is being lauded as a successful trading coup by obtaining Josh Hill from the Western Bulldogs for pick 49 in the upcoming draft. Eagles CEO Trevor Nisbett declared the club “very satisfied” with the result, especially because Hill “fills a hole in the list”.

West Coast was chasing a player capable of replacing the recently delisted Jarrad Oakley-Nicholls, and Hill is believed to be a perfect fit.

“Jarrad has been a very important member of the club since his recruitment in 2009” said Nisbett.

“What he brought to West Coast in terms of team balance was unparalleled. You can have as many dead-eye-dicks as you like, but there needs to be balance, and no-one topped Jarrad in terms of turnovers”

“Unfortunately, his disposal was showing too much improvement at WAFL level for East Perth, and with tight list restrictions put in place by the AFL, we had to let him go.”

West Coast also lost another turnover king in Brad Ebert in trade week, who sought a move home to Port Adelaide. Nisbett said the club was perplexed with the decision, not by Ebert, but by Port to accept him.

“This is exactly what we meant about team balance. Port already has more than enough ball butchers”

Nisbett was also quick to reiterate that Hill would be given time to develop into his role, and that the Eagles had enough depth in that position to cover Hill until he became settled.

“We have guys like Masten, Swift and even Dalzeill running around for us at the moment, so Hill is in good company”.

Meanwhile, the Western Bulldogs couldn’t believe their luck.

“We would have been happy with $20 and a bag of new footies” said amazed Bulldogs CEO Simon Garlick.

 

Fremantle Devastated with Clark Loss

The Fremantle Dockers lost Mitch Clark before they ever had him.

Testament to the harsh reality of Trade Week was the blunt loss of Clark to Melbourne, after he publically stated he wanted to become a Docker. Melbourne secured the rights to the West Australian with not only a better trade offer for the Lions (Pick 12 ), but a greater financial package.

Fremantle Football Manager Chris Bond called a press conference early yesterday morning to ease the minds of the Dockers faithful.

“The Fremantle Football Club would like to assure our loyal supporters that we did everything in our power to get Mitch to our club” said Bond, very, very slowly, keeping his target audience in mind.

“Unfortunately, Melbourne’s contract offer was far greater than we could match. We held a cake sale and even did a car wash, but it still wasn’t enough”

Bond said that Fremantle were still reeling from that result, especially given the great success that the club has had recruiting players in the past.

“It’s even more disappointing knowing that we missed out on a great opportunity to keep this club on track. We can’t dodge the finals for ever, you know.”

“Our trade history shows that Clark would have really helped this club do that”.

Bond reiterated that Fremantle has a history of pulling off great trade week deals. He went on to specify Trent Croad, who “starred for the Dockers for two years” after being recruited from Hawthorn, while Des Headland was “obviously worth every penny” Fremantle gave up for him.

In other news, Fremantle are now considering modifying Pavlich’s role. Again.

 

AFL Delighted with Trade Week Spectacle

The AFL have released a statement lauding the ‘obvious success’ of Trade Week, and hinted plans for it to be extended to Trade Fortnight in the coming years.

Chief Executive Officer Andrew Demetriou argued “Why not increase the drama and entertainment?” in a short press conference in the lobby of the Hilton on Monday afternoon.

“We have seen an unprecedented level of interest in trading between clubs and the players involved, adding to the general spectacle that is Trade Week” spluttered Demetriou in between spoonfuls of caviar.

“Never before have we seen such big stars attract the headlines over such a period of time. The more the fans are captivated, the better it is for the game of AFL”

When queried about which stars he was referring to, Demetriou didn’t miss a beat.

“Mitch Clark was great for us. The interest in him was huge, I mean, he nearly made the All-Australian team a few years ago. I think. And Josh Caddy – the intense speculation about a two-game player in the final minutes of trade week was incredible!

“And, of course, household names like Ebert and one of those skinny Morton kids found new homes too.”

The AFL suggested the Trade Fortnight proposal would only gain momentum given this year’s raging success. With 18 clubs up and running and an uncompromised Draft on the horizon, even more activity is expected in future trade periods.

However, Demetriou responded hastily to a reporter’s suggestion that the AFL was only ‘worried about revenue’, and that ‘a longer trade period is not what the fans really want’ as the AFL has previously claimed.

“That is completely untrue” scorned Demetriou as his assistant polished one of his many gold rings.

 

No Love for Dawson at Trade Table

St. Kilda will be forced to negotiate a deal for Zac Dawson after the defender failed to attract interest from other clubs during Trade Week.

The Saints are currently under salary cap pressure which they sought to release during the trading period, with Dawson’s contract one of a handful that has not yet been negotiated.

St. Kilda List Manager Ameet Bains was dumbfounded as to why Dawson was snubbed so completely.

“Dawson has been great for us, especially over the last few of years. He’s played a key role in 3 Grand Finals over that period, he’s young and fit and ready to go. I don’t understand how there isn’t any interest in him?”

DT Squawk can reveal that it has nothing to do with Dawson’s football ability – it’s his lack of commitment.

The Brisbane Lions are one club that have been in the market for a key defender, but List Manager Rob Kerr said his club is “not interested”.

“Don’t get me wrong, Dawson’s a solid player. But our research indicates he is a bit hesitant with his commitment to a club, and that’s not what we’re looking for”

When asked about specifics, Kerr opted not to comment. Melbourne official Tim Harrington was much more open about the Demons lack of interest.

“He’s a pussy, plain and simple. We’ve already got Cale Morton, we can’t handle another.

“What am I basing that on? Well, we all saw that photo with him and Riewoldt about a year ago right? There’s his Captain, fully committed to whipping out his waxed little fella, and then you have that weak Dawson prick holding some pretty box or something – talk about selling your teammate into trouble. He didn’t even have his pants off! There is absolutely no more room for players who sit on the fence at this club.”

Newly appointed St. Kilda Coach Scott Watters said he would have “none of this half-in, half-out business” and assured the media that it was the first thing he dealt with as Senior Coach.

“I got him in a room and we had a frank chat about commitment. I pulled out mine, and after a while, he pulled out his. It was a great moment for this proud club”.