The Weekend Wash-Up – Grand Final Edition

As the season finally comes to an end it’s time to wrap up the year that was, covering the winners and more importantly the biggest losers for the season. For the final time in 2024, it’s time for the weekend wash-up!

Winners of the year

Backs:

Whitfield (111) – One of only six players to survive the year in my team, Lachie Whitfield was the poster boy for starting with a player despite their early bye. It was baffling to me how he wasn’t dominating early in what can only described as a disgusting half back role, and he responded by averaging 124 after his bye. Piggish numbers. I’ll miss him being in my team come Round 1 next season, but look forward to grabbing him after the inevitable 40 when hard tagged.

Sheezel (112) – When we describe overthinking in AFL Fantasy, not starting Harry Sheezel is the perfect case study. Going on to average a whopping 112 in his second season, he bolted out of the gates averaging 129 during the first 5 rounds playing that dirty half back role. Yes he may be a little overpriced for his new role, but as a forward Sheezel will remain relevant in our starting teams next year. Remember this when picking Colby to start 2025…

Clark (97) – Everybody will jump on the bargain basement players, but the best selections you can make are the unique under-priced premiums (or breakout premiums) that take the jump to becoming keepers. Jordan Clark did exactly that, starting the season priced under $700k and while he may have slightly overstayed his welcome, he was one of the best value picks of the season. Never forget that final quarter v Melbourne.

Ryan (pre byes) – A slightly controversial selection, but how could I ignore a man that averaged 113 leading into his bye. If you got on him early he would have been one of the picks of the season, provided you also jumped off early. He may make a couple of appearances in this article.

Newman (post byes) – Nic Newman is the poster boy for why you can’t judge a player on their full season. Yes he ended up averaging 102, but you needed to jump on just before his bye at ridiculous value. From Round 8 he averaged 111 after bottoming out at $750k. The value plays throughout the season deserve their respect, and his L5 of 126.4 was naughty including that monster grand final.

Uwland – We also can’t forget our early season cash gen heroes, and most of us actually missed out on the best D8 play of all. Bodhi Uwland started slow, but when I consider the fact he cost $90k less than Marty ‘the party’ Hore who I held for 4 months, it was well worth the wait. He scored 89 and 124 during the best 18 byes leading up to his week off, peaking at $600k. Huge.

Howes – Lastly a quick shout out to the most popular defensive cash cow Blake Howes. We might have already seen the best of his AFL career come and go, but we don’t care. Thanks for the memories, and the cash gen.

Midfielders:

This line was really tough. No player averaged over 110, surely an all-time first. Paying up certainly wasn’t the answer…

Martin (107) – It was the midpricers that dominate the midfield winners, or perhaps more specifically the midfielders turned half back flankers. Nic Martin was the lock of locks this year, and his average of 107 reflected that after starting in the mid 700s. To those that held faith with him, he rewarded them with back to back to back 120’s to close the year during finals. I’ll miss him.

Steele (107) – You may laugh, but hear me out. The guys we really want to start with in midfield are the ‘roses’ who may have seen their standards slip from previous years. Jack Steele was exactly that in 2024, priced under 100 and starting under $900k. Despite a down middle of the season, don’t forget his flying start, averaging 121 in the first 5 weeks. As a non-owner, I haven’t forgotten. He ended in the top 8 midfielders, what more can you ask?

Treloar (110) – The only midfielder to average 110 for the season. What a bonkers stat. It probably helps when you get to play with Bontempelli, seeing barely any attention every week while racking up 30+ disposals with ease. The main thing was he stayed fit, and ended up an incredible POD. Congratulations to any genius who started him.

Butters (107) – Yes we may have had our ups and downs, but Zak Butters started the year priced under $900k and joined Steele in the top 8 midfielders from that under-priced bracket. You can’t ask for much more. Another player that lasted the full season in my team, so he comfortably sits in the winners list for me.

M.Crouch (Pre-shoulder) – Matt Crouch, former uber premium and walk up 105 average fantasy gun started the year at $734k. Back to full fitness and undisputedly in Adelaide’s first team. And we didn’t start him because…? Before his (apparent) season ending shoulder injury, he averaged 106 which would have had him right around the top 8 midfielders. Even better than that, he injured his shoulder in the first quarter and pushed through to score 133, moving him above $900k and a perfect stepping stone to an uber premium midfielder. One of the underrated picks of the year.

Bonner (pre byes) – The streets will never forget Riley Bonner’s two month stretch where I can only assume Lachie Whitfield was wearing the Riley Bonner suit. He averaged 95 until Round 10, starting the year priced at $463k and peaking at $800k. If you timed your exit perfectly, he was pretty close to pick of the year behind the X man. It goes to show while a name may seem ugly in pre-season, you just need to trust the role…

Holmes (pre byes) – Every year a team will have someone they declare ‘their boy’. Max Holmes was mine. Starting the year as a midfielder priced at $685k, Holmes averaged 99 until his bye while picking up defender status along the way. I guess people were scared to trust him after he wasn’t on their pre-season radar, but it was an example of trusting the eye test. I’ll go again next year Homma.

Neale (Round 8 value pickup) – The players we often undervalue are those guys who have a stinking start to the season and find themselves as unbelievable value. The hardest thing is trusting that it will turn around. It sure did for Lachie Neale. After Round 7 he was averaging 81.8 and priced at $768k. His remainder of the season? An average of 108 which would have made him a top 8 mid. And he was under $800k. In the middle of upgrade season. Trust the name, unless they’ve gone off the rails of course.

Roberts – Matt Roberts not only started the season on fire as the perfect cash cow for our teams, he ended the season averaging 108 in his last 5!!! One of the easiest picks you’ll make in 2025, what a finish to the season. 

McKercher – My watchlist for 2025 is honestly overflowing at this point. Colby was an elite rookie for our teams, but more importantly he now has Sheezel’s half back role. Don’t make the same mistake next year. Start Colby.

Sharp – A man I now call the black hole of the wing, Jez Sharp just runs all day. I underestimated him in fantasy, dumping him early as many others did. If you held him until his bye, you were rewarded with an average of 81 and a price rise of $450k. Huge. 

Ruck:

Marshall (117) – My relationship with big Rowan will forever be tainted by the day he copped a little knock on the knee and had apparently stepped of a f**king land mine. The lesson to take out of this is if your premium gets named, you hold them. Unless they have done a hammy of course. R1 and it will be tough to start without him next year.

Xerri (115) – The rucks carried fantasy scoring all year. The top 3 averaging players in 2024 being rucks was not on my bingo card. And it certainly DID NOT have a man priced at $580k (!!!) to start the year, who didn’t have an early bye, who I decided not to start, becoming the second highest scoring AND averaging player for the season. Idiot. Pick of the year, and frankly one of my first picked next year. What made it even better was he averaged 125.4 after his bye. Read that number again. Potential ruck pig. 

Gawn (Pre-injury) – We didn’t know it at the time, but the start of this season was Max Gawn’s fantasy swan song. It’s easy to forget he was averaging 121.4 before his bye, comfortably the best of anybody in the competition until that point. Thanks for the memories dinner plates.

Forwards:

Zorko (110) – The forwards pick themselves. And when I say forwards, I mean half back flankers that just so happened to have forward status. It was great to get Zorko back on board for one last roll of the fantasy dice. You couldn’t have seen this coming at the start of the season, and I assume Coleman’s return will put an end to it. A true draft league winner.

Flanders (108) – While they may have been owned by every man and his dog in Classic, the top forwards would have carried draft teams around the country. I’m not sure I could trust Flanders roles enough to pick him at this price, but starting the season just over $800k he was a no brainer. Gun.

Caldwell (94) – Jye Caldwell’s season on a whole may have been up and down, and his role is hard to trust when Essendon are fully fit. However there was no denying he was a must have forward, especially for those four weeks where Tom Rockliff had the Jye Caldwell suit on. 

Heeney (105) – After the eighth straight year of pre-season midfield group pre-season articles, many doubted Isaac Heeney’s ability to ever be a top AFL Fantasy asset. He answered them in style. A true weasel, he was bloody elite when it counted most. The fact none of these four guys will be forwards next year is a genuine concern. It was fun while it lasted.

Dempsey – Onto the cash cows and Ollie Dempsey barely got a mention during pre-season, but paying up for his $252k price tag was one of the best investments you could have made. He went up almost $450k at his peak price and was the clear number one forward rookie. Early congratulations on his rising star.

Wilson + Lohmann – Neither were spectacular over long periods, but both played vital roles. Darcy Wilson was a stalwart in our teams early in the season when trying to field a forward rookie, making us $400k along the way. Kai Lohmann was the under rated rookie of the year though, delivering scores of 99 and 98 during the byes and making people a sneaky $300k while he was at it. Kobra Kai was elite.

Dyl Moore (Post bye) – The Dylan Moore roller coaster isn’t a smooth ride, but you just have to trust the process. After his bye he averaged 105 in a line lacking top premium quality, comfortably beating even Isaac Heeney down the home stretch. You probably can’t start him next year but you’ll surely need to finish with him. Gun.

Losers of the year

Defenders:

Ryan (post byes) – Let’s be honest, this is what you’re really here for. And don’t think Luke Ryan is getting away with being called a ‘winner’. He might be one of the biggest losers of them all. $1.03 million for an overweight slob that likes chippy chippy. Of course he does. Perhaps he needs to bring the peroxide back? Never again.

Budarick – Ah, we always have a Round 1 stinker. Budarick’s 25 was an extra special f**k you though. Thanks for that one champion.

Stewart – I was going to put a clause that discounted his effort from round 16-21, but a f**king 26 will do more than enough to ruin that. The bloke had a last 3 average of 61 to bring it home and cement his spot on the TOP of my never again list. I don’t care what role he has. I can’t even say his name. Never, ever again.

Sicdawg – Ah, the sick dawg. *vomit emoji* I’ll always be down for a game of russian roulette when it comes to owning Sic, unfortunately a few people got shot this year. Next year he might deliver you a 180. You know what you’re in for, and I won’t rule out the fact I’ll do it again. This is obviously coming from a non-owner…

Salem – Of all the dumb sh*t I’ve done in AFL Fantasy, I have never been dumb enough to own Christian Salem. And I hope I never will be. Wake up people. Some got away with this one, others didn’t. And they deserved it. He sucks. 

D’Ambrosio – Yes he may become an All-Australian, but I haven’t forgotten what ‘Mas’ put us through to start the season. He teased us with a couple of 90s, only to drop a 4 round average of 53 on our heads. Have that one. I’ll find it hard to ever own him again, what a pathetic effort that was. *Cue me getting sucked in by Round 3 next season*

Houston – If you were dumb enough to bring in Dan Houston, you deserved that 47 (WTF) against the Saints. However that snipe on Rankine during my draft final… That I will not forgive. And Port challenged it! This has me softly wanting Port to win the flag, f**k you Dan.

Hore – Ah, ‘The Party’… $107,000 I’ll never see again. I’m starting with Toby Pink next year.

Midfielders:

Newcombe – Remember when Jack Steele shaved off the hair and became a fantasy superstar? It’s making open minded when deciding whether I trust Jai Newcombe again. Yes, I have always maintained he was a mid-season pickup for a reason, and that 5 round average of 69.4 to start the year says as much. BUT. Every man has their price, and I got off early enough for our relationship to not be completely ruined. Still, 69.4…… That was embarrassing. Those under-priced premiums hey. Sometimes maybe good, sometimes maybe sh*t.

Oliver – I’ve got to be careful what I write here. Perhaps I’m better off steering clear… Not of potential controversy, more so of red heads with a crippling drug addiction. Noted for next year.

Serong (post byes) – After averaging 112.5 heading into his bye on the back of 7 straight tons, people paid up for *checks notes* 3 tons in 11 games at an average of 95 for the remainder of the year. That is honestly just sad. Apparently he was on radio saying he was tagged every week after his bye, and even IF that was true, which it wasn’t… You can’t say that! That’s a quote from every amateur footballer ever after they had 5 touches in the first quarter on a half forward flank. Tagged himself, maybe. Gutless.

Walsh (post byes) – What’s the saying? Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice… I fell for it again. The man can only play 10 weeks a year. It definitely makes Walshy a value starting option, as long as you jump overboard come the byes. Sore back. Embarrassing.

Tom Green (Round 8) – There are three types of fantasy coaches this season. The ones who owned Tom Green in Round 8, the ones who didn’t… And the ones who traded him in that week. Personally, our relationship is honestly in a good place and I’ll happily run it back in 2025. His efforts brought me flying back up the rankings. I can’t blame anyone for doing the opposite. That injury was a season ender. A proper derailing. Sh*t happens. 

Rozee’s hamstring – What a classic. I may have missed a lot of the sh*t I threw at the wall this season, but predicting Rozee’s downfall on the back of a 5 day hamstring was one of the easiest calls I will make. It was compounding pain for his owners after so many captained him for a 70 the week before. Don’t go as far as putting him on your never again list, just hope those hamstrings fail him again early next year. That was a little bit sicko, but it is what it is.

Taranto (until Rd 24) – Tim Taranto looked like he had lost all scoring ability until that 145 in Round 24. I wouldn’t let that tempt you for next season, his supercoach score of 105 would suggest he still doesn’t have any footballing ability. I don’t think I want to pick a non-rookie Tiger for years. Dark times are ahead.

Parish – I am officially announcing our break up. I know he will be devastated to hear it but I can’t continue on like this. I used a bloody second round draft pick on him. I refused to listen to hate watchers, but maybe he is just an accumulator after all… Grim. 

Rucks:

Grundy – Frankly if your name wasn’t Xerri, Marshall or Gawn, you were a loser in the ruck department this year. The bar was set high, and it was no surprise that the former ruck pig wasn’t close to clearing it. I put my body on the line for him, and he went straight f**king through me. The feather in his cap was his Round 23 score of 44. How the f**k do you score 44 in the ruck? That might have decided draft matchups around the country. NEVER AGAIN!

English – When you look up the definition of a lumbering buffoon, you used to see a picture of Reilly O’Brien. I have made the update for it to now be Tim English. The All-Aus ruck who can’t win a hit out against a steeplechaser. I feel like Harry with the sorting hat begging him not to come to the Eagle’s. Then again, we have Bailey Williams. Have mercy. 

Jordon Sweet’s immune system – Round 24 was dead set vindication, not only for Jordon Sweet but his former owners. He averaged 82 and went up $300k! We picked him up for a rookie! So no, the real loser was his immune system that let him down at the wrong time. Then the second biggest loser was Ken Hinkley deciding he would play Dante Visentini for a few weeks just to see how f**ked up sh*t could get. He almost got fired, now he has a home prelim. F**k you Ken. We knew the answer all along.

Forwards:

Fisher – The Fish… It was up and down. Mostly down. Choosing a butcher to throw into the half back role was always an interesting choice, and I think it’s safe to say it didn’t really pay off. I’ll be surprised if he gets a game next season. Yeah, never again.

Sexton – The sex pistol actually played his role during the middle of the season, and I’ll never forget that EPIC chip fest against the Saints. That being said, on a whole… He sucked. 2024 really was the year of throwing just about anyone down back to rack up cheapies. We ate good.

Jackson – Blanket Jackson, a man I’m pretty happy to have never owned this season and quite possibly never own again. He was so sh*t in the ruck during Round 22 that Fremantle played a debutant in what was effectively two elimination finals. Over a million dollars for what? That has got to be close to the worst contract in the AFL. Second to Sean Darcy. We’re in the midst of our worst 3 year run in club history, and I’d still rather be an Eagles fan. Shout out to you Freo. 

Powell – Tom Powell may have others fooled, but I see straight through it. Owning him all season in draft will do that. 34. Thirty-four in the grand final. A below average footballer and hopefully his last ever fantasy relevant mention. 

McKenzie – Cam McKenzie… The streets won’t forget what you did to us. 41 in Round 1 after his little pre-season tease was just a classic gag for those that started him. It was so bad I was planning who I would trade him out too at the end of the first quarter. Sam Mitchell thought similar, getting him out of that midfield rotation by half time. Every year there’s a Cam McKenzie, and every year I’ll get sucked in. It is what it is.

Fyfe – I knew Nat Fyfe was past it, but I didn’t think he would average fifty. Lord have mercy. Just another $400-500k swing and a miss in our Round 1 teams. He’ll honestly be lucky to have not played his last game of AFL, I just don’t understand how a former Brownlow medallist becomes that sh*t. It was honestly impressive.

Jordon – Not only did James Jordon dog our fantasy teams, the bloke doubled down and ruined our premiums scores as well! He is pretty close to my loser of the year, his name actually makes me gag. James Jordon. What kind of name is that anyway? I don’t want to see his face again. A perfect man to cap off this team of LOSERS.

This game sh*ts me

Do you know what really sh*ts me? Final round BS. Teams are trying to be tricky like it makes any f**king difference? Sydney are a bunch of absolute heroes, GWS too, what’s in the water in NSW. As if this game isn’t bad enough already, now we’re trying to copy the NBA? Who are they trying to fool, it was absolutely pathetic. Onto next year I guess, I’m just glad I wasn’t having to stress about those late outs at the top of the rankings! I’m looking forward to the off-season, because this game really does sh*t me. 

The other bits and pieces

Sh*t season. 2323, 1243. I lost my head those last few weeks and honestly that is a slight regret. It’s two consecutive seasons I have come out of the byes in the hat hunt and completely bottled it.

My team had raced a good grand prix, but coming in to lap 52/58 there has been a serious gear box failure. In fact it was a 5 car pile up and the whole thing has caught fire. Thank god the season is over.

Congratulations to any legends who made the top 100, I ended 660 points off. Just one or two close calls hey! 

As a former winner I’m proud to congratulate the people’s hat winner Dylan N on coming 69th. Giggity. That was a perfectly executed tank in that final round, it takes a great coach to win that hat.

Lastly, congratulations to Selby for winning his third Hilux!

If I can takeaway one thing from this season, it would be to not let my emotions get the better of me. But then what kind of washup would we be left with?! Thanks to all you legends for another fun season, I look forward to melting for you all over again in 2025. And a special thank you for anyone who supported the podcast too! It was a fun last ep and we’ll be back bigger and better next season.

Now, it’s time to enjoy the off-season…

Matt