Chop’s Chopping Block Round 15

Just like Lindsay Lohan is to jail… I’m back! That’s right, after sluggin it out over the terrain that is the Kokoda Track I am back and absolutely spewing about what I have witnessed over the past few weeks. Firstly, my overall ranking was 3000 when I left and put my team in the hands of my fellow DT Talkers. What is it when I get back…. 5000…. F ME. Apart from that it would appear that they don’t teach AFL footballers to drink enough milk and they are dropping like flies. This week I only scored 1998 because of some pitiful performances from some members of my team. Now, I normally scan the entire league looking for all types of players that may have let their coaches down, but this week they are all from my team. How many of these players let you down, like they did me????

Corey EnWRONG– OMG, what a pathetic performance from someone who has been a rock in my team this year. Averaging mid 90s, naughty Corey decided to go out and throw his skirt over his head and score me 42 points. Jordan Lewis was playing a disgusting forward tagging role on him (shame on you Clarkson) but even still, harden up and go and get the footy.

Nic Naitanui – (43pts)A Brompton, is the term that is commonly used to describe something that is built up to be something huge or cool and just ends up letting everybody down… at least I think it is…. Commonly used to describe a fart that someone talks up to loud and spectacular, only to fizzle out into the softest, girliest fart ever heard. Nic Nat, you are a Brompton my friend. The only reason you wouldn’t take the cake as the biggest Brompton ever… is because, at least you stink. 6 possessions… are you kidding me… there are homeless people walking the streets of Melbourne, with more than that in their napsacks… :(

Ryan O’Theif –Mr Ryan decided that he would rob every Dream Team coach out there on the weekend, robbed us of points he did, unless he did manage to squeeze through your window and take your plasma, and then you’re really unlucky. Did this guy have a few frothies before he played on the weekend? He gave away 5 free kicks, that would have taken your piss poor score of 66, up to a slightly less piss poor score of 81. Not good enough ya little nugget!

Bendan Goddard– I must admit that I am not even sure as to why you did not play. But in all reality I don’t care!!!! When the coach comes to you and says I think we might give you a spell this week so that you can trim you ranga hair. Tell him to shove it…. Harden up Goddard and get back in there next week. You owe me 140+