Calvin’s Captains – Rd. 23

pirate bird

For the very last time in 2013, welcome back to Calvin’s Captains. This week is the grand final round of Dream Team … for those who are still active. This week presents us with some people that seriously look like ‘no brainer’ options, but after digging a little deeper (like pirates do) I found issues with picking our biggest guns this week. So, you better make sure you read this very carefully this week.

3 Big Dogs

The Bulldogs play Melbourne so we are expecting things to get pretty nasty on Sunday afternoon. But, I have some big concerns. Let’s start with the guy who will get the tag from McKenzie, Ryan Griffen . He did score 136 on the Demons in Rd. 14 but on that day, McKenzie didn’t play. Before that McKenzie did tag him and saw him score 66 (16d) and 115. Ok… not great! McKenzie is the #1 tagger in the league at the moment though and has held Dangerfield (92), Fyfe (77) and Ablett (64) in recent weeks. Griffen has only scored 77 and 92 in his last 2 this year and is just too risky as your skipper for this week I’m afraid. Matthew Boyd on the other hand should have a great record against Melbourne considering he avoids the tags right? Ding dong… you’re wrong. With previous scores of 90, 84, 93 and 86 in his last 4 against them it makes you just scratch your head in amazement. He’s scored 93 and 81 since returning from injury but out of all the Bulldog players the guy I like is…  Tom Liberatore. Now, he had 144 on Melbourne in Rd. 14 this year but has failed to crack a ton in his last 3 games for 2013. The kid can play and is the ideal guy to avoid all tags and rip it up again. I’m not saying get on him as a captain, but a great guy to trade in this week ahead of his team mates that’s for sure.

Oink City

Dane Swan love the MCG or as we like to call it… the Sty. From Rd. 11 onwards he has averaged 133 there and dominates. He met the Kangaroos in Rd. 1 and opened his account with a nice 123 (31d, 10m). He never played them in 2012, but prior to that he knocked out 148, 162, 123 and 117 on them. He has been in ripping form with scores of 122 and 131 in the last 2 weeks and has averaged 125 in his last 5 runs for the year. It’s pretty simple if you need to play a straight bat this week. Swan is easily your man. Let’s not forget that his team mates will be at the Sty as well. Scott Pendlebury had 124 in that Rd. 1 clash with 30d to be one of the 4 Collingwood players to crack the 100 mark that day. He had just 97 on them in 2012 with 107 and 141 the year before. He scored 129 last week and is moving pretty nicely at the moment. A solid option for a COD if that’s your cup of tea. Dayne Beams should be back this week and would be a better COD option than Pendles if you ask me. He had 129 and 116 on the Roos last year and should be great once again. This is my concern though for this game. Last week, in a losing game to the Hawks, the Kangaroos didn’t allow any of them to score 100+… not one! The week before that, Jobe Watson was the only guy to do so. Therefore over the last 2 weeks, just 1 guy has scored 100+ on them. Nuts. Am I worried? Ha ha … a little but I’ll be oinking loud on Sunday afternoon. Just watch me.  #oink


Joel Selwood doesn’t like Raines. Form is form and facts are facts. I get that! But as a captain? In your grand final? I’m here to pass on the info so here I go. Selwood has been in smoking form averaging 134 in his last 3 this year and plays at Simonds where he has averaged 132 in his last 4 games there. He is carrying a lowest score of just 98 in his last 8 this year and hasn’t failed. BUT… this week Raines will tag him. For sure.  Check out the graphic above of the games where Raines has tagged him over his last 5 games against the Lions (it’s the one with the cloud over the score for those simple ones). Last week, Raines held Griffen to just 77 and has done a number on him before and is every chance to do it again. You have been warned. So why is he #3? We’ll, form alone has to sit him there, but out of the 2 Geelong boys, I favour Steve Johnson this week. He’s had 132 and 143 in his last 2 games this year and averaged 120 at Simonds from his 5 games there in 2013. He had 129 on Brisbane in Rd. 13 this year and should be awesome this week.

Just Quickly…

Josh P. Kennedy Vs Hawthorn @ ANZ Stadium: Kills his former team! He had 121 on the Hawks earlier this year and even had 96, 113 and 149 on them in 2012. He’s only cracked the 120+ mark in 14% of his games this year though, but what a great roughie at ANZ.

Nick Riewoldt Vs Fremantle @ Etihad Stadium: Was awesome last week with 152 but carries 0x100+ scores in his last 3 games against the Dockers.

Michael Barlow Vs St Kilda @ Etihad Stadium: Consistency King. Now, he did only have 77 last week but scored the 7 rounds before that between 97 and 116. He got his 4th straight 100+ on the Saints earlier this year (111pts) but has only had 106 and 91 in his only 2 games at Etihad this year.

Tom Rockliff Vs Geelong @ Simonds Stadium: 139, 95, 115 and 144 are Rocky’s last 4 scores for this year and has been on fiiiiiiirrrre! But, he only had 77 on the Cats earlier this year but that was when he was receiving hardly any mid time clock.  Shit call Vossy! Before that game though he had 128 and 117 on Geelong and should be great again.

Brendon Goddard Vs Richmond @ the MCG: Possibly my biggest smokie for the week but I am very confident. Goddard has averaged 116 over the last 3 week and is carrying a lowest score of only 94 in his last 5 games for the year. He had 122 last week and even had 131 on Richmond earlier this year and 110 before that. In fact ladies and fellow seamen, he has averaged 120 on the Tigers over his last 6 games making them one of his favourites to dominate. A wicked COD if you want to roll with it.

Leigh Montagna Vs Fremantle @ Etihad Stadium: Last week, Montagna’s 123 was his 6th straight 100+ score for the year… he is really turning it on at the moment. He copped the tag from Crowley last time they met but still managed to rack up a very nice 117pts. Before that though, he had 0x100+ scores in the 5 games leading into that great 117. Will Crowley got to him? Media are saying No… I’m saying who really cares, not the best captain on this list and certainly not the best COD either.

Scott Selwood Vs Adelaide @ Patersons Stadium: Over his career against the Crows he has only scored 1×100+ score on them in his 5 games. He’s only averaged 106 in his last 3 this year and yeah… he’ll be ok, but not an option for what I write about.

Gary Ablett Vs GWS @ Metricon Stadium: Some people are trading Gaz out this week… YOLO! Pretty crazy if you ask me. Ok yes, he has had poor scores in recent weeks but this is the guy who ‘everyone just locks in each week’ or ‘set and forget’ ha ha… yes these people have gone quiet. But Gazza actually might be ok this week. He had 33d, 3g (131) on the Giants in Rd. 5 this year and posted 99 and 106 on them in 2012. Solid! But last year, he faded away to finish the year as well with scores of 89, 64, 82 and 71. There’s a pattern but he is a prefect COD this week as no one who has a wicked team will ride with him this week. They’ll go Swan. You never know, Gaz could have 160+ and Swan does a hammy (heaven forbid) but footy is footy and these things can happen.

Best COD’s (excluding top 3) in order: Goddard, Rockliff, Beams, Ablett, Libba and JPK.

Thankyou very much to all my loyal readers each week. If it wasn’t for you guys I surely wouldn’t be writing this for myself. Calvin’s Captains averages around about 28,000 hits each week and it’s you guys that make my efforts worth while. Thanks a lot for a great season (sorta) and I’ll see you all back in here next year for the one and only Calvin’s Captains.


Who will you have as your captain for the very last time in 2013?

  • Dane Swan (59%, 1,093 Votes)
  • Steve Johnson (24%, 437 Votes)
  • Joel Selwood (3%, 46 Votes)
  • Brendon Goddard (2%, 30 Votes)
  • Tom Rockliff (2%, 36 Votes)
  • Dayne Beams (1%, 11 Votes)
  • Gary Ablett (5%, 90 Votes)
  • A Western Bulldog (4%, 80 Votes)
  • Someone Else (2%, 31 Votes)

Total Voters: 1,839

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This week, you can bet on Calvin’s Captains top five as a group over on Luxbet. All five Captain choices have been given odds for the round. As of Thursday evening the prices are as follows: Dane Swan (2.75), Steve Johnson (3.50), Joel Selwood (4.50), Brendon Goddard (6.00) and Tom Rockliff (9.00). Think you can pick it? Then sign up at Luxbet and have a dabble at this fun market. 18+ only and please, gamble responsibly.


  • If you missed it last night, here is the lowdown on the most significant sanction in AFL footy ever and what it means for the club

  • Great work Pirate!
    It started with Swan, it ends with Swan!

  • Thanks for everything this year Calvin.
    Swan is locked in atm but it may change to Stevie later in the week as I know my opponent will be going Swan.

  • Cheers Calvin, think I have gone with one of your top 2 all year.

  • You the man, Calvin. Thanks for the write ups every week

  • Well done for the entire year Calvin. Good advice as always.

  • Thanks for a great article and a great year Calvin!

    I will be closing the year the way I started it.

    Oink!!! Oink!!!

  • Good work Calvin, thank you for the helpful advice over the season.

    Although I can’t understand why you’re not putting Gary Ablett in your top 5 every week, he has such a high average!

  • Hey Calvin thanks for this year! What is your prediction on Crowley? Will he actually go to Montagna? And are the media strongly saying no? Cheers

    • No disrespect to Calvin, he has done a fantastic job all year, and saves alot of people s**ts loads of time researching players previous scores, history etc.
      But i watched the Freo v Saints game earlier in the year, and im pretty much certain Crowley went to Dal Santo, Montagna just ran free all game. So going by that i hope the same happens again. Monty will hopefully mop up loose in defence for planty of +6’s.

      For me i dont think you can go away from the the Pig in the Sty! My COD would be Stevie J though.

      • Montagna got Crowley after Half time, and opnly scored 39 in that half after his 78 in the first. I’m really wondering whether to trade him or not. Will lock in Swanny as C of course.

        • ohk cool, thats alright, i just remember Joey pushing hard late in the last quarter for uncontested possies, with no one on him, and considering Creepy wears his opponents like a glove i assumed he went to Dal Santo. I reckon im gonna bring Stokesy back in up fwd this week, he has been on fire lately, JJK to the pine.

          So torn though, who will score more Stokes V Brisbane at Simmounds or Reiwoldt V Freo at Etihad ??

  • Thanks for the kind words lads. Quick answer here if I can…

    Crowley …. should go to Dal Santo but did spend time with Montagna in their last game. Either way, Montagna doesn’t stack up against my top 5 thier either way, not even as a COD. My thoughts anyway.

    And yeah, started with Swan… ends with Swan #oink

  • Cheers for the help throughout the year Calvin.

  • Tempted to go with Stevie J. I don’t like that North have only given up one ton in their last two games…

    I’m up against Cotchin in the GF.. Maybe he will captain himself?

    Whatever I do will be wrong anyway!
    Thanks for your efforts throughout the year Calvin.

  • Worth bringing in JPK this round?

    Looking for a GF smokey out of Masten, Dusty, Prestia or Mundy.

  • I’m going Simon Black as captain this week, as a thank you for the years of service he has given the Lions. Tom Rockliff will wear the VC, in case Blacky doesn’t get up.


  • Cheers for the help Calvin.

  • calvin, calvin, calvin and calvin we meet again. well done for the write ups during the year and this week was gd as well but swany again C really. instead of him oinking he should be pointing 122 last week but not great when knowing he was on 105 at three quarter time and only got 122 thats crap. this my top five for everyone.
    #1 Steve Johnson
    #2 tom rockcliff
    #3 tom liberatore
    #4 travis boak (COD)
    #5 dane swan

    STEVE J: kills Brisbane FULL STOP.
    ROCKY: in ripping form and will finish with that.
    TOM: kills low teams and i think theres a 150+ there.
    BOAK: under the radar player kills carlton and its at the ammi were he owns up and last game at ammi for ever ticks all boxes.
    SWAN: just put him in there but no C there.

    • Yeah good stuff Brad!

    • You better check your grammar because STEVE J, does NOT kill Brisbane… 129, 81, 74, 81, 131, 72, 85, 84, 111, 71, 50 and 53. The FULL STOP was misplaced!

      • Not last year he wasn’t as good last year this year he’s got the highest average.

        • Scarfey can u please tell me what’s Steve j lowest scare is and how many times he has scored under 100 this year compared with last year. Stats isn’t always the key Steve j scored 86 on Sydney last year and scored 132 this year what a difference get it right.

      • brads captions,haha!

    • Brads ‘CAPTIONS’ haha. Farrrrrken hell.
      Lets set some things straight.

      1 – Stevie J usually struggles against the Lions. I dont think he will this time around, but he hardly ‘kills them’. As already stated his last scores were 129, 81, 74, 81, 131, 72, 85, 84 etc.

      2 – Rocky I think will be good. The last game he only scored 77 but pretty sure he was suffereing from a case of Vossyitis.

      3 – Libba is very inconsistant and doesnt really ‘kill’ low teams. yes he had 144 on Melb last time (the only time) he played them. But on other low teams he has scored:
      GCS – 78, 102, 76.
      GWS – 61, 48
      PORT – 115, 56, 97

      4 – Boak most certainly does not kill Carlton. Scores of 74, 63, 81, 56, 89, 101, 97.

      5 – Oink!

      So, along with checking your spelling, grammar and a few other things can you please check your facts.

      • Sorry big fella was in a rush I’m going by stats I’m going by this year stats get it right steve j got 86 on Sydney last year and gets 132 this year where’s last year stats there. And u saying port is a lower team they are hell good this year lastly boak might not kill Carlton through stats but his form of late is well worth a choice as C and its at ammi.

        • Port have been a low team over previous years, hence why I put them in there.
          Also its AAMI stadium, not ammi.

          • I can see you’ll not from SA we say ammi its short for ammi stadium. Get it right mateee.

  • pirate FTW calvin you go alright too mate

  • What was Calvins Captains average V8? #oink

  • Great write up calvin! Good work for the year!
    And also brad = tool..

    • U need to mix it up big fella give others people’s ideas of captains not just calvins.

  • This is called Calvins Captains mate. People come here because he gives sound advice for the best captain options for the week. If you don’t like his options or thin you can do better, maybe you should start your own website with Brads Craptons, see how that goes

  • Awesome stuff all year Calvin, thanks for the time and efforts for all the quality info week in week out.
    Brad after your comments and contributions over the last couple of weeks I can’t believe your not right up there battling it out for the big prize against the likes of Hook and Shane.
    Once again cheers Calvin

  • What’s your team name brad so we can have a look at the list that got you to 207th

  • Does anyone think Barlow will be affected by the 10 changes to the freo team? Will he receive a tag against the Saints?

  • Def: Goddard, Ellis, Gibbs, Enright, o’brien, Hibberd ( ibbo, frost)
    Mid: swan, ablett, pendle, barlow, cotchin, beams, jelwood, griffen( crouch, o’meara)
    Ruc: cox, kruezer ( Grundy, Naismith)
    Fwd: rocky, Martin, JJK, stokes, Steve j, Niewoldt ( o’brien, Dwyer)
    That’s my team I was proud of it.

  • My team is cheese N krakouers

    • No it’s not and heres why. On account of have a look at your team you posted a few days back, then have a look at cheese N krakouers’ team. Note to Brad you don’t get 10 changes a week, its 2, Meaning your a scummy lil toy who should probably stop trying to make himself look good because it’s doing the exact opposite. Your’e probably not even in a GF ya bloody head.

  • Swan not oinking #fmdt

  • ok, ok, ok, ok you win well done every one i had a fun time tho. well done matt your good at dream team.

  • its not fair north aren’t in the finals they would be a very good team in the finals not carlton they will lose first game.